Is the paint dry yet?

Day 18. What happened today in Brazil.

I said this before and I'll say it again...Costa bloody Rica happened today. But more of that later.

First up today was Holland-Mexico. Holland were looking to show that they could live up to their "serious contenders" tag, which only started after the first round. Before that, everybody in Holland seemed to think they were pretty bad and were definitely going out in the first round. Even the manager, Van Gaal, didn't have much hope for the future and had decided that getting criticized constantly in Manchester was better than abuse at home. To make matters worse when Holland qualified for the last 16 as the top scoring team, the Dutch critics complained that Van Gaal's team had abandoned the Dutch way of playing football. As far as I can remember when they reached the final in 2010, the Dutch looked as far from Total Football as Greece did. But Holland found a way. After going behind to a beautiful Mexican goal, the Dutch kept going and going and going, until finally equalizing 2 minutes from the end, and winning with a controversial (when are they not?) penalty in the 4th minute of injury time.

Of course we can all feel sorry for the Mexicans. They really were very, very close to the quarter finals. But they really needed a second goal. You can never sit on a one goal lead when you have a goalkeeper who is that good. You know, the kind who has the game of his life against Brazil and then does it again today, but part of his brilliance is down to his eccentricity. And at one point he will decide to come for a cross because in his head he is going to spectacularly punch it away, but in reality he realizes he is nowhere near able to do that, and he looks like a fool when the other team scores because the goalie is nowhere to be seen. The goalie in question, Ochoa, knew he was at fault. How was it obvious? Did he do what every goalkeeper does when they concede a goal, yell at their defenders? No. Silence. Mea culpa. Of course the gullible English clubs are lining up to sign him, based on a couple of inspired performances. Ajaccio, in the French second division, who released him at the end of this season must know better.

Mexico, and their captain Marquez, gave away the late, late penalty. Was it a foul? The debate in Mexico will go on forever. In Holland it ended once everybody Dutch heard a whistle and the referee's arm pointed to the penalty spot. Does Robben dive? Sure. Did his foot make contact with Marquez's foot? Yes. Should Marquez have stuck his foot out, knowing he had a known diver trying to get around him? No. Is it fair? Happens all the time, and if it wasn't given the debate would have raged the other way. In the end the men in the orange ties and blue jackets were jumping out of the Dutch dugout, and looking forward to how they could not screw up against either Costa Rica or Greece.

I imagine that many Europeans, apart from the Greeks I hope, might have gone to bed before the end of the Costa Rica-Greece match. So allow me to describe what happened. The teams came out, the national anthems were sung and that was it. Excitement over, until 120 minutes later. In between, Costa Rica ran with the ball, Greek defenders hoofed the ball as far away as possible, Samaras tried some skill but was offside. Karagounis fouled a Costa Rican and then threw his arms up in the air...What. me? Costa Rica ran with the ball, Greek defenders hoofed the ball as far away as possible, Samaras tried some skill but was offside. Costa Rica ran with the ball......the crowd did the Mexican wave......another Greek player was offside. Karagounis fouled a Costa Rican and then threw his arms up in the air...Ref, c'mon, I didn't touch him. But hold on, a chance...Greece must score...no...ball hits Costa Rica goalkeeper on hip and goes out. Half-time whistle. Second half.....Here we go, Costa Rica running, nothing doing, Greece lob a few passes up field, nothing happening. Then suddenly Bryan Ruiz hits a pass towards the goal.....and it is a goal! Best thing that could have happened, Greece had to attack now. They tried and tried but couldn't break down the defence of the team that has St Kitts and Nevis as it's regional competitors. And then Costa Rica had a player sent off for a second yellow card. And the crowd went wild (the Greeks) or booed (the Costa Ricans and Brazilians). Or did they? Most of them must still have been in line for the toilet or beer (see yesterday). Or they were so bored they just couldn't be bothered. And on we went. Greece brought on the mystery man, Kostas Mitroglu, the striker who couldn't stop scoring in Greece, was transferred to Fulham for a record fee, but was then injured or not fit enough for English football, and.....nothing happened. The Greeks seemed disinterested in scoring, which was rather concerning for any knowledgeable neutral watching. Greece always do this, yet in the end, the very end as it turned out today, they find a way. 90th minute and Sokratis Papastathopoulos bundles in a rebound and we all nodded (or shook?) our heads in complete acceptance of the inevitable. Extra time had a little drama, mostly centred around who looked more knackered form running around aimlessly for 120 minutes. At the end of the extra time, before penalties, Fernando Santos, the Greek coach managed to get himself sent off for arguing with the referee. The penalties were going pretty well for both sides until number 5 for Greece was saved and Costa Rica scored the next one to go where they have never gone before. And, thankfully, it was all over.

This really was a terrible match. Bbc pulled out the "turgid affair" description again but really turgid does not do it justice. This was the match that you hoped anybody wanting to watch football for the first time was not watching. I was thinking of all the Americans who had heard about how great this Fifa World Cup thing is and wanted to get in on the action on a Sunday afternoon and saw this. They must have really wondered how this could be any more exciting than watching cars going round an oval track for hours, or sitting in a half empty baseball stadium hoping somebody would hit a ball so they don't have to keep checking facebook, twitter and instagram on their phone, in the hope that somebody's updated a status, because there's nothing happening out on the field. Yes, it was that bad. There have been some exciting 1-1 draws over the years (France-Brazil 1986 was one of the best ever), and others where you could at least appreciate the tactical battle. This had nothing. It's only saving grace, that saved me looking for re-runs of question time in the Canadian parliament, was that it was the last 16 of the World Cup. Hopefully never again in the next 2 weeks.

Tomorrow, we should have a couple of crackers. Maybe. France and Nigeria might battle end to end, or France might just be too good. And Algeria are out for revenge against Germany. The head says Germany will be too good, but I'm sure many heads said that in 1982. For 90 minutes, or 120, can we ignore oppressive regimes and...one, two, three! Viva L'Algerie!