Day -287 WorldCup2018
Like many other boys I started watching football with my Dad. At the beginning I thought he knew everything about football. We watched, I learned. Over the years, as probably with many other boys, I realised what my older brothers must have already known, that he didn't actually know everything. He knew his stuff. He knew about Billy Wright and Wolves (greatest team in the world) and Honved (who beat the greatest team in the world) and the teams that visited Malta after the war, and that all Maltese football matches were settled by bribes and not on the pitch. And so his comments became amusing, entertaining, frustrating, endearing.
"They train all week, that's all they do. They get paid to do this and they can't even shoot straight. Pathetic."
There was a lot of England watched on TV and Malta watched live. The pattern of comments was repeated over the years.
At the start of an England match:
"Oh no, he's playing again. Why do they always choose him? Surely, there are better players in England."
Five to ten minutes in:
"Always the same England. They don't know what to do with the ball. You watch Brazil and Germany, they pass they move. The English players are standing still."
Throughout the match:
(Groan after groan) "Why do they keep passing backwards? Come on. Pass it forward. Now they're trying to walk it in. Shoot man! Shoot!. What kind of shot was that?"
It probably started in the early eighties.
"Shilton? Look at that. He's too old. Isn't there a younger goalkeeper"
"Butcher, Robson.... time to get rid of them. Get some younger players."
"Ah Vinegar...Lineker? I like him. He's quick, moves a lot. This is what England need.'
"That Lineker is so lucky. He just always happens to be in the right place at the right time. He just waits for the ball in the penalty box. He never touches the ball otherwise."
"On no, Lineker's coming on? I should turn it off now."
"What's his name. Gas...what? Gascoigne? Is he good? Never heard of him."
"Ah, this is what England need. Gascoigne dribbles, shoots. (Sitting up straighter) He's good."
"Gascoigne again? Where has he been for the last year. Injured? Really? I just don't think he's that good."
And on and on it went. Always entertaining, wouldn't have been the same without the commentary and Mum going between laughter and annoyance. "Is Eastenders on yet. Aidan, can you turn it on for me on the other TV?"
Fast forward to 2014 and a phone conversation with him after England's first match at the World Cup in Brazil, which they lost but nonetheless:
"England had all these young players. I don't know most of them but they looked good. They passed, they moved well."
I don't remember talking to him after Iceland beat England at Euro 2016. But I can just imagine what he thought of all those now not so young players.
Concurrently, there were trips to "the stadium" to watch Malta play.
"I wonder how much we'll lose by today."
"Look at the other team even while they are warming up. Look at the ball control and they look like they know what they are doing."
"Malta can't get the ball out of their own half, unless they kick it as hard as they can."
"Pass it, pass, don't just kick it to the other half."
"Get rid of it. Why are they trying to pass it around? Just kick the ball away."
"Wonderful. Look at the other team how they are always moving. And the ball control."
"Malta's players are just standing still. Nobody knows how to move for the ball."
"In the past we had some really good players. I could mention a few. I don't even know any of these players now."
"John Buttigieg? Why did Brentford think he was so good. Look at him. All his fault."
"Carmel Busuttil. He's like a foreigner. Look how much he moves."
The manager's Maltese...he doesn't know what he's doing. We need a foreigner.......Malta should just give up...why do they even bother playing these teams.
So what happens on Friday when pathetic England play terrible Malta? The clash of anti-support for two teams will be very entertaining. Which way does he go? What will win him over in the first few minutes: England playing like Brazil ("but it's only Malta") or Malta trying to play proper football ("but they should stop trying to play all these passes").
I wished I could be there to be at the match. But this is also one time I would have loved to have been there, sitting with my Dad, listening to what he has to say, biting my tongue, getting crackers for him to stay awake. We've watched a lot together but never Malta vs England.
Like many other boys I started watching football with my Dad. At the beginning I thought he knew everything about football. We watched, I learned. Over the years, as probably with many other boys, I realised what my older brothers must have already known, that he didn't actually know everything. He knew his stuff. He knew about Billy Wright and Wolves (greatest team in the world) and Honved (who beat the greatest team in the world) and the teams that visited Malta after the war, and that all Maltese football matches were settled by bribes and not on the pitch. And so his comments became amusing, entertaining, frustrating, endearing.
"They train all week, that's all they do. They get paid to do this and they can't even shoot straight. Pathetic."
There was a lot of England watched on TV and Malta watched live. The pattern of comments was repeated over the years.
At the start of an England match:
"Oh no, he's playing again. Why do they always choose him? Surely, there are better players in England."
Five to ten minutes in:
"Always the same England. They don't know what to do with the ball. You watch Brazil and Germany, they pass they move. The English players are standing still."
Throughout the match:
(Groan after groan) "Why do they keep passing backwards? Come on. Pass it forward. Now they're trying to walk it in. Shoot man! Shoot!. What kind of shot was that?"
It probably started in the early eighties.
"Shilton? Look at that. He's too old. Isn't there a younger goalkeeper"
"Butcher, Robson.... time to get rid of them. Get some younger players."
"Ah Vinegar...Lineker? I like him. He's quick, moves a lot. This is what England need.'
"That Lineker is so lucky. He just always happens to be in the right place at the right time. He just waits for the ball in the penalty box. He never touches the ball otherwise."
"On no, Lineker's coming on? I should turn it off now."
"What's his name. Gas...what? Gascoigne? Is he good? Never heard of him."
"Ah, this is what England need. Gascoigne dribbles, shoots. (Sitting up straighter) He's good."
"Gascoigne again? Where has he been for the last year. Injured? Really? I just don't think he's that good."
And on and on it went. Always entertaining, wouldn't have been the same without the commentary and Mum going between laughter and annoyance. "Is Eastenders on yet. Aidan, can you turn it on for me on the other TV?"
Fast forward to 2014 and a phone conversation with him after England's first match at the World Cup in Brazil, which they lost but nonetheless:
"England had all these young players. I don't know most of them but they looked good. They passed, they moved well."
I don't remember talking to him after Iceland beat England at Euro 2016. But I can just imagine what he thought of all those now not so young players.
Concurrently, there were trips to "the stadium" to watch Malta play.
"I wonder how much we'll lose by today."
"Look at the other team even while they are warming up. Look at the ball control and they look like they know what they are doing."
"Malta can't get the ball out of their own half, unless they kick it as hard as they can."
"Pass it, pass, don't just kick it to the other half."
"Get rid of it. Why are they trying to pass it around? Just kick the ball away."
"Wonderful. Look at the other team how they are always moving. And the ball control."
"Malta's players are just standing still. Nobody knows how to move for the ball."
"In the past we had some really good players. I could mention a few. I don't even know any of these players now."
"John Buttigieg? Why did Brentford think he was so good. Look at him. All his fault."
"Carmel Busuttil. He's like a foreigner. Look how much he moves."
The manager's Maltese...he doesn't know what he's doing. We need a foreigner.......Malta should just give up...why do they even bother playing these teams.
So what happens on Friday when pathetic England play terrible Malta? The clash of anti-support for two teams will be very entertaining. Which way does he go? What will win him over in the first few minutes: England playing like Brazil ("but it's only Malta") or Malta trying to play proper football ("but they should stop trying to play all these passes").
I wished I could be there to be at the match. But this is also one time I would have loved to have been there, sitting with my Dad, listening to what he has to say, biting my tongue, getting crackers for him to stay awake. We've watched a lot together but never Malta vs England.
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